Gibson Bloat

Wow, I saw some very recent footage of “Charles” Gibson on the Colbert Report today. Incidentally, I love the Colbert Report even though Stephen is a Hillary lover. Anyways, Gibson looked horrid. It was shocking. I wondered if the guilt from that awful barrage of biased debate questioning had caught up with him. Then, I read the following within the pages of Hunter S. Thompson’s The Great Shark Hunt and it all made sense.

Many appeared to be in the terminal stages of Campaign Bloat, a gruesome kind of false-fat condition that is said to be connected somehow with failing adrenal glands. The swelling begins within twenty-four hours of that moment when the victim first begins to suspect that the campaign is essentially meaningless. At that point, the body’s entire adrenaline supply is sucked back into the gizzard, and nothing either candidate says, does, or generates will cause it to rise again…and without adrenaline, the flesh begins to swell; the eyes fill with blood and grow smaller in the face, the jowls puff out from the cheekbones, the neck-flesh droops, and the belly swells up like a frog’s throat…The brain fills with noxious waste fluids, the tongue is rubbed raw on the molars, and the basic perception antennae begin dying like hairs in a bonfire.

And that’s exactly what Gibson looked like as an interviewer questioned the relevance of his line of questioning. He blathered some stock line about “electability”, which even my handy-dandy spell-check feature assures me isn’t a real word. No, Gibson, like Stephanopolous has been strong-armed by his network. Now they are paying the price — especially Gibson. Just take a look at him sometime soon before the Disney execs shoot him full of botox to cover it up.

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